Finally found out that I’m not going to be on the next season of Junk Raiders – which is fair enough because I’m pretty invested in Burning Man now. Am I disappointed? Yes. But it serves as a bit of a lesson I think. I need to actually build more stuff. I think that the greatest flaw with my application was the lack of tangible things I had available to show off my imagination and my talents. This isn’t a kind of beat myself up over it moment, rather its more of a calm acceptance. Being on the show would be hard without more construction experience, and if its on again next year I’ll have that experience. Plus, its time to start filling up my ETSY store (you didn’t even know I had one did you?) with lamps, bongs, furniture, you name it.
Building stuff is something that has always intrigued me, but for a long time I had this story running in my head that I wasn’t actually that good at building things. When I was young I built some stuff with my dad. The Boy Scout pinewood derby springs immediately to mind. We had some innovative design ideas (namely adding heavy metal to the car since its a gravity powered race) but our execution lacked the proper care. Again I had similar problems in shop class with minor details resulting in flaws. So of course my young mind began to think that I was bad at making stuff. In truth I think I just didn’t have enough patience with myself to do a good job, or I was rebellious and tried to use my own ideas and techniques before I even understood the basics.
I have matured since then. I’m better at being patient, at learning from my mentors, of thinking things through and finally, most importantly, of accepting things that are imperfect but forging ahead anyways, knowing that the experience will bring me closer to perfection the next time.
For me ideas are easy. My brain swells with ideas all the time. Finally I am learning how to actualize some of those ideas. So I’m not going to be on a reality TV show this fall, the principle benefit wasn’t money or fame, but rather time spent working on these things. Working with my hands. Working with my mind. Working through my fear of not being perfect. Applying to be on the show inspired me to revive the builder and designer inside of me. I’ve started to work on creating again and I’m happy as a result. So I won’t be building a loft or a condo from scrap, that’s fine, I’ll be doing things that are more personal and specific to me, and I will enjoy the benefits as well.
Who knows, maybe there’ll be a Junk Raiders 3 and I’ll be ready.