Stabbing from the grave

Oh this is rich. A brilliant shining example of everything that’s back assward and fucked up about modern capitalism. Namely that two REAL beavers could probably manage a company better than the virtual rodents that represent Bell here in Canada. Soft and cuddly my ass.

The following is a transcript of my vain attempt to get Bell to stop spamming me a month after I cancelled my subscription to their service. I must note that the customer service agent was slow as fuck, indicating either she was eating a rice noodle bowl or she had ten chat windows open at once.

(Incidentally chat based customer service is none the less faster than trying to find a human voice on the phone, even if they end the conversation with silly macros.)

System
Welcome Nathan Taylor.
System
Connecting to server. Please wait…
System
Connection with server established.
System
Ganesa (SCI-274225) has joined this session!
System
Connected with Ganesa (SCI-274225)
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
Hi Nathan Taylor, welcome to Bell Sympatico Services, my name is Ganesa (SCI-274225), how may I help you today?
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
Good evening, Nathan.
You
I’d just like my ap.films@gmail.com address removed from whatever system is sending me “Information from our discussion” messages.” on a daily basis.
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
Do you wish to stop receiving spam messages for ap.films@gmail.com
You
yes
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
I am really sorry, we have no access with gmail account, since it is sympatico Internet service help desk, however, I suggest you to contact google for further information about your gmail account.
You
No, YOU’re sending me emails.
You
I’ve recieved over 100 emails from bell tech support in two months.
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
Are you sympatico Internet service subscriber?
You
I was, I cancelled my service a month ago. Now i get even more emails.
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
May I know, your b1 number and complete address with postal code, so that I can pull your account and check with that.
You
My original was B1NAQK62, however there were problems with that account and it may have been changed to a second B1 temporarily. Area code is h4c 3g7
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
Thank you.
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
I really appreciate your patience.
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
Nathan, I have remove the gmail address from our records, hence you will not receive any more mails to your ap.films@gmail.com from sympatico.
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
Is there anything else I can assist you with?
You
That’s all. Thank you very much!
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
You are most welcome.
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
Thank you for choosing Bell and have yourself a great day.

Don’t forget to visit our new Sympatico Internet Forums website by following this link: http://www.bell.ca/internetforum

and also our Customer Service web site at this link: http://service.sympatico.ca

Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
Have a great week ahead!
Ganesa (SCI-2742 25)
Thank you for your business.
System
Ganesa (SCI-274225) has left this session!
System
The session has ended!
Here’s hoping the emails actually stop. More than 100 in less than two months…
P.S.: Its with great pleasure that I know the agent is to in revulsion at her job that she probably dreams of skewering her eyes out, if only they’d let her have a pencil…
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